She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
