Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
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