I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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