After last night, I could never be a politician.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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