textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
