I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
