Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
