big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
