i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I pour the whiskey from now on
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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