I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
