She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize