That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
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