More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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