It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
do nipples grow back?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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