Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
