I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
