Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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