508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
