I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Randomize
