# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
