No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Randomize
