nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
