'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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