i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize