I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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