He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I think my vagina is haunted
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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