I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
being pregnant is like rehab
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
