She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
