just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
