We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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