i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
