what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
