Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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