I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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