i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
