barbara walters just said penis...
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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