Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
