so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize
