I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
