its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Randomize
