Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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