2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
