I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
