You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
