Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
