i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
We have so much sex to catch up on
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I had to cum in my sink.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
