Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
