We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize