Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
