He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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