I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
